you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
