yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
BRING THE BAGELS
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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