awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
