The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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