Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
