just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Vodka?
Forever.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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