TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
