We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
