My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
