well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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