she was so not down for the gang bang
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
