you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
