Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize