the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
