He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
dude. I can hear the air.
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