well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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