I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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