Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
did you just send me my own nude
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
