yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
