I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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