Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize