Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
