Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Randomize