forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
