i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
