Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
