I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
