well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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