You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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