So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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