As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
She made me pour olive oil on her.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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