Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
