youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
