what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I have already put on my inside pants.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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