he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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