Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
How naked do you want me to be?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
