I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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