i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
God I need to hump something, right now.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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