Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize