My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i dont even know how to be here
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
