Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
