What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
