Swine flu. Run for my life!
I'm jealous of your bromance
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I think a kid would responsible me up
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
