Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
