how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
And the cops told us we were all naked.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
