do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
