I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
