Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
