you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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