I wanna passion pit in your ass
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
