We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
