Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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