I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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